


When It Comes to Love, the Time Is Always Right

by FlyingPigPoet



Series: Lois & Clark Request the Honor of Your Presence [1]
Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Agents of SHIELD, F/F, F/M, Person of Interest, supergirl - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-04
Updated: 2018-06-08
Packaged: 2019-05-18 00:01:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 9,222
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14841716
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FlyingPigPoet/pseuds/FlyingPigPoet
Summary: Lois and Clark finally tie the knot. What could possibly go wrong?For some reason A03 has made all of the stories in the series Lois & Clark Request the Honor of Your Presence be the first in the series, which is weird, because I have done a series before and it always worked. Here is the order you should read each story so that it makes sense. (And yes, time travel is involved, so this REALLY matters):1. When It Comes to Love, the Time Is Always Right2. It's a Wonderful Secret Identity3. Even a Secret Hero Can Have Feet of Ice4.  Consequences of Your Actions





	1. Prologue: Twenty Months Earlier...

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to bathtimefunduck and jdgreenwalt117 for heading me in the direction for this one-shot (i.e., novella). Unlike Implications of Your Heartbreak, where the majority of chapters have a single point of view, most the chapters here will be ensemble, because I really want to compare how the different groups deal... with the shtuffs I have planned. Heh, heh, heh.
> 
> The first section happened during Season 2, before the Daxamite invasion derailed a lot more than one wedding...

Good News? Bad News?

Lucy Lane had gone back to the desert with the hundreds of alien prisoners, overseen their processing, grabbed her mail and a change of clothes and gone back to National City, back to Maggie's place.

Maggie was cooking fettuccini Alfredo while Lucy opened her mail, but dropped the spoon she had been stirring the sauce with when she heard Lucy gasp. Turning the burner down, she came over to see Lucy staring at a thick cream envelope with her name and address written out in careful calligraphy.

"Wedding?" she asked.

Stunned, Lucy handed her the envelope. The return address was Lois Lane's.

"Wait, that's--"

"My sister."

"Wait, you didn't know? She didn't tell you before this?"

Lucy snorted. "Lois? Hardly. This is totally her style. And her maid of honor will probably be somebody she met last week."

"Not you?"

"Me? I'm just her sister," Lucy said bitterly.

Maggie slid her arm around Lucy's waist. "Well, no time like the present for bad news. Open it up."

Lucy used her finger to roughly tear open the fancy stationery. The card announced that Clark Kent and Lois Lane were thrilled to announce their wedding in Metropolis, blah, blah, blah. Inside the card, a handwritten note said, "Lu-- Would you be my Maid of Honor? It'd mean a lot to me! Love you! Lois!"

"Huh."

"So... that's good, right?"

"I have no fucking idea. And if the bridesmaid dresses are a horror show, I will simply refuse to go."

"But if you do go..." said Maggie.

"What?"

"Um, nothing. No, I just."

"You would go with me?"

"Of course I would. I mean, I still haven't figured out what we are, what we're doing here? But I understand problematical families, and the importance of someone having your back."

"Well, the Danvers will be there anyway."

"They know your sister?"

"Kara is Clark's cousin."

"Seriously? That's a huge coincidence."

Lucy gave her a surprised look and then coughed. "Yeah, I forgot you didn't know... Yes, a coincidence. Ironies all around... But, seriously, you would be willing to go with me?"

"Absolutely. Give me the date and I'll go talk to my captain, make sure I can get time off."

Passing Lane (8:45): Alex, check your mail.

Big Danvers (8:48): Holy SHIT.

Passing Lane (8:50): I know, right. She never said a word about this to me.

Big Danvers (8:52): Sis, have you talked to Clark lately?

SuperSister (8:53): He left text messages a few days ago, but I've been really busy. Why?

Big Danvers (8:54): Read them. NOW.

SuperSister (8:57): OMG! They're getting MARRIED!

SuperSister (8:58): He wants me to be his best person!!!

SuperSister (8:59): Do you think I could bring Lena as my plus one?

Big Danvers (10:00): Lu, um, Kara wants to bring Lena as her plus one. Would that be too weird for Clark?

Passing Lane (10:01): Fuck him. Kara should bring who she wants.

Big Danvers (10:02): Because he's asked Kara to be his best person...

Passing Lane (10:03): All the more reason. I like Little Luthor. Clark can suck it.

Big Danvers (10:04): Kara, Lucy seems to think it won't be a problem, but when in doubt, ask...

SuperSister (10:05): That makes sense! I'll call him now!

SpaceDad (10:05): Alex, did you get an invite from Clark and Lois? I thought he didn't like me...

Big Danvers (10:06): Um, Clark is complicated?

Big Danvers (10:07): Hey, babe, want to go to a wedding with me? It's Clark and Lois.

House of Vasquez (10:08): Will you wear a nice dress and sexy lingerie?

Big Danvers (10:09): For you? Duh.

House of Vasquez (10:09): Name the date and I'll inform J'onn.

Big Danvers (10:10): Pretty sure he already knows. Probably half the DEO will be there.

House of Vasquez (10:12): So a big gay wedding for a hugely straight couple? Should be a blast!

//

In Which I Take My Courage in My Hands...

Winn's life had suddenly gotten really interesting. On the one hand, ew, Agent Vasquez had tasked him with figuring out a technology that would allow his ex-crush Kara to have sex safely with her new girlfriend, his basically-geek-crush, Lena Luthor. On the other hand, James was back at the DEO being all manly and exciting, and Winn didn't entirely know how he felt about that, but it felt... different.

On the other hand... Wait, what kind of alien had more than two hands?

Anyway, the point was that Winn also had just been invited to go to Clark Kent's (freaking Superman's!!!) wedding and he did not have and probably would not have in two months, a plus-one person of interest. Which totally sucked. He had gone to maybe fourteen weddings in his life and he had attended them all alone. But Superman's wedding? Oh, he totally needed a plus-one for that.

He went down to the lab where Jillian Holtzman was figuring out the red sunlamps that Kara and L-- that Kara needed. And he watched her with awe.

"Hey, Holtzy," Winn said. "Still working on that thing?"

The woman grinned, slipping on her safety goggles. "Well, actually, I took it apart, discovered what made it tick, wrote up the specs, did a mechanical drawing of it with the help of this sweet baby here--" She stroked the computer on her lab desk. "And now I'm building a prototype with Earth materials to see whether the plasma will successfully shoot our enemies into an early grave, or, failing that, melt into a white-hot maiming puddle of metal in our hands. Right now, I'd say our odds are fifty-fifty."

Winn blinked. "O-kay! Well, let me know if you need a hand with that."

She winked at him. "Oh, I never say no to applause! But what about you, Winnie the Pooh?"

Winn ignored that, blushing and glad that none of the other agents had heard it. "I'm trying to generate red sunlight."

She pulled her goggles up to the top of her head and looked at his drawings and the pieces of his prototypes. "What are you using for the crystal actuator?"

"Earth quartz."

"Martian quartz would be better."

"Of course it would, but we can't get a piece big enough. The stuff is expensive and, strictly speaking, a regulated substance."

"Hmm. Well, if you have any at all? How about a layer of Martian quartz between two layers of Earth quartz?"

"But they vibrate at different rates."

"Sure, but that isn't necessarily a bad thing."

Winn watched her pull a mechanical pencil from her pocket and sketch what she meant on a corner of his plans and he immediately saw what she meant. "Aw, Holtzy, that's genius! Marry me!"

Holtzman laughed.

Winn blushed some more. "Oh, wait. I forgot. The girls said you're another lesbian. Sorry!"

"Another?"

"Oh, yeah, turns out that the DEO is lousy with them. You'd think we'd actually made that pink kryptonite!"

"Well, then you'd turn into a lesbian too," she joked.

He sighed. "Yes, I like the girls. But I think I'm sapiosexual. I really get turned on by the smart girls. And one man crush in grad school with one of my professors..."

"Was he gay?"

"Oh, God, no. Wife and three kids. I kept it to myself."

"Yeah, well, I'm pan, so I feel you. Loving outside the bounds of the cis, straight, white, blah, blah, blah, can get old really fast."

She smiled at him again and he felt it to his core. "Um, Holtzy. If this is inappropriate, please tell me, but... Um, would you go to a wedding with me? Like, as my date?"

"A wedding? Whose?"

"Clark Kent and Lois Lane."

Her eyes widened. "Like Major Lane's sister?"

"Yeah."

"You mean I'd got to see Lucy Lane in a dress?"

"Probably."

"And we could talk nerdy about tech stuff when major wedding type stuff wasn't happening?"

"Absolutely!"

"Hmm. Well, I would totally not wear a dress to this. You get that, right?"

Winn shrugged. "You can wear whatever makes you feel happy." He was nervous about saying this, because he'd seen what she wore to the alien bar a few times, but he figured that Clark would understand. Probably.

Holtzy grinned and gave him a high five. "Okay, Agent Schott. You've got yourself a date!"

//

Big Sister Manual, Chapter 27

Alex was having a blast. Normally, she ignored Kara's occasional fit of blushing and wild hand movements when they talked about things like sex, because she knew that at heart Supergirl wasn't bothered by those things even if Kara Danvers was. She didn't entirely understand her sister's strange two-sided response to sexual topics, but she was used to it and knew how to get around it when she needed to, like the talk they had when Kara's period had started, or when she was getting ready to go to her senior prom with a boy Alex didn't entirely trust, or hell, before Kara went off to college. She was direct and emotionless and supportive and never, never teased.

Well, almost never. Certainly now that Kara was in a serious relationship with Lena Luthor, Alex figured Kara had finally got her shit figured out--well, both the sisters had, really, and it was mostly, mostly, much, much easier. So she had figured, after Kara's declaration that she was going to test Clark by going to his wedding in a tux, that sure, a tux was fine, but if she was going to have Lena Luthor as her arm candy and roommate in the Metropolis hotel, by God, Kara was going to wear sexy lingerie underneath it. And Kara's eyes had gotten wide, but she had nodded shyly, agreeing to the necessity.

But actually getting her into Victoria Secret was another thing. And Alex was a good big sister. She was. She was fearless and devoted and brave and kind and supportive.

But let's face it. The Big Sister's Manual also had a chapter on teasing your little sister mercilessly. Not all the time, of course not.

But occasionally...

So she dragged Kara to the back of the store, where she picked up a lacy bra and underpants in a bright blue: Supergirl blue.

She grinned evilly. "Kara, this is perfect! Blue is totally your color! It'll bring our your eyes! Lena is totally going to love these!"

Kara blushed and looked at the ceiling. "I don't know, Alex, maybe I should just go with my usual black Jockeys. I mean what if I get, you know--" She whispered, "Called out for an emergency..."

"Your suit will keep them safe and they'll match your suit too, so, big plus there!"

"Er, um, right! Well, okay then! And what about you, Alex? You're going to have to up your game if you're going with Vasquez. I mean she's been out for a million years, right? So she probably has, um, expectations." Despite herself, Kara managed to wiggle her eyebrows. She reached out for a set with cheetah markings. "For example..." she said, grinning.

Just at that moment, their earpieces went off and Winn's voice was saying, "SG crisis and, hey, huge surprise: it's NOT in the warehouse district! National City University Science Center is under attack, and if that is not Cadmus doing the attacking I will eat my cardigan!"

The sisters dropped the merchandise, groaning and sternly marched toward the store's door. An overly made-up and underly dressed blonde said, "Ladies! Can I help you with your unmentionables today?"

Kara used her deep Supergirl voice. "Not today, ma'am. We have work to do."

Alex yelled back, "Put the blue and the cheetah on layaway. We'll be back when this latest fuckery is dealt with!"

//

A Most Important Mission

Lucy had threatened to wear her uniform to the bridal shop in Metropolis. She had gone dress shopping in uniform before, and it always elicited one of two responses. Either the skinny little clerks had gone overboard to find her a dress that was hyper-feminine, presumably to "make up for" her uniform and job, or they had simply tried to get her out of the store as quickly as possible, because they figured otherwise she might, what? Shoot it up? Lucy didn't care if it meant she got through the painful process faster.

But, no. Lois had put her stiletto-heeled foot down on that one. Plan B. Lucy had gone to Kara and asked for a little bitty favor. When Kara had heard what Lucy wanted, she sat down abruptly on her couch, laughing so hard she could barely breathe. She gestured weakly. "Take... whatever... need." And then laughed even harder. When Lucy had gotten what she wanted, Kara was gasping for breath.

"Good... luck..." 

So Lucy had dressed up for this difficult afternoon in Metropolis, took the high-speed rail rather than driving so that she could use the time to bone up on alien surveillance techniques. Ever since Winn's alien girlfriend had turned up, one of a species that could not be captured on camera, Lucy had been searching for alternatives. She was not surprised that some of the tech out there that was trying to address this problem came from L-Corp.

Pulling out her phone as the countryside passed by at speed, Lucy called the number for the company's CEO.

"L-Corp. Lena Luthor's office. My name is Jess. How can I help you?"

"Hi, Jess. My name is Major Lucy Lane. I don't think we've met, but I am from the same division...." Lucy glanced around the business section of the train before continuing somewhat more quietly, "of the FBI as Director J'onnz."

"Ah," said Jess, knowingly. "And what can I do for you, Major?"

"I've been researching some of your company's special surveillance technology, the ones driven by big data analytics. I would like the opportunity to speak with your CEO about the possibility of contracting L-Corp to create a signature version of that tech for our group."

"Let me take your name and number, and I will consult with Ms. Luthor and get back to you on that."

Lucy gave her the contact information and hung up. Out the windows, she could see the familiar cityscape of Metropolis and she focused on her mission.

No flounces. No flounces. No flounces.

When she dragged her rolling bag behind her into the station, she saw Lois immediately, dressed like Jackie Kennedy in a little skirt suit with a little matching hat. Who the hell wore matching hats in the twenty-first century?

They air-kissed like a couple of debutantes, and then Lois took in Lucy's outfit: the blue raincoat, the blue chinos, the blue and white polka-dotted shirt. The little brown oxford shoes, the little brown belt. The little pale blue cardigan over it.

"Um. Lucy?"

"Yes, Lois?"

"Your style has... changed..."

"Oh, that. Well, you said no to the uniform, and I find this style very practical. I can run or fight if I have to while also being, you know, color coordinated." She smiled sweetly.

"Um, okay... The car is... over here..."

Lucy's smile was angelic. What did they say at West Point? Always keep your enemy guessing? So true.

//

Not Enough Evidence

J'onn rubbed his eyes. He'd been looking at the budgets now for over an hour and he couldn't remember a single thing he'd read. He stood up and stretched, then pulled all the papers out of his in-box: memos, letters, and one thick cream envelope with his address written out by hand. The wedding. He hadn't expected an invitation, given his long-standing disagreement with Kal-El about the reserves of kryptonite, but maybe Superman hoped he'd serve as a distraction for General Lane. And what do you get the Man of Steel for his wedding anyway?

There was a knock on his door and Alex and James came in looking worried.

"Why do I get the feeling that you're going to tell me that our crime-free day is coming to an end?"

"Not exactly," said Alex. "Maggie called. Apparently, all day people have been turning themselves in at all the precincts in town for jaywalking, cheating the parking meter and taking two bags of chips when they only paid for one."

James said, "There's something in the water."

"We think the two phenomena might be linked."

J'onn pinched the bridge of his nose. "Why does the name Maxwell Lord immediately spring to mind?"

"Maggie's already volunteered to arrest him, but I don't think we're going to get enough evidence. Chemicals aren't like hard tech or computer coding. There's no signature or style involved."

Winn joined them, looking uncertain.

"What is it, Agent Schott?"

"Sir, this isn't alien, I know, but it seems clearly extra-normal. There is a huge herd of dogs at the reservoir."

"Flying dogs?" asked Alex. "Because that was no fun last time."

"No... Just regular dogs."

"Then that is the NCPD's problem not ours." And that didn't solve his wedding present problem, but J'onn would take what he could get.


	2. Updated Invitations

The day after they finally put down Reign, Alex bought a copy of the Daily Planet and went to Dollywood. In the pocket of her leather jacket was an envelope with stiff fancy paper, a LOVE stamp, and her name and address in calligraphy on the outside. She hadn't opened it yet. She was going to need a stiff drink before she did that.

Fortunately, M'gann saw her come in and immediately pulled down the scotch and carried her drink to her usual booth before Alex could even say hello. "You are a life saver."

M'gann made a face. "Sorry, not a fan of the peppermint."

"They come in wintergreen too!" said Alex, as M'gann walked away laughing.

She pulled the envelope out of her pocket, but decided to flip through the Planet first. Clark's coverage of the battle against Reign was balanced, but mentioned nothing about the Worldkiller's planet of origin. Well, she couldn't really blame him for that.

"Is this seat taken?"

Alex looked up to see Callie Torres grinning at her. "Um, yeah, no. Feel free."

"So apparently, I timed my epic under-thought-through drive across this enormous country to just miss your epic battle with an alien witch goddess. Am I getting this story right?"

"Close enough."

M'gann brought a glass of red wine for Callie. "Good to see you back, Doctor."

"Thanks. Hey, Lexie-- Sorry, Alex. I've been back for like thirty-six hours and when I went in to check on Livewire, I heard some crazy stories about you leaping out of buildings."

"It's no big deal."

"Okay, your foraging a dozen dead bodies to so that your class of interns could practice on them was, well, a lot of things. Weird, disrespectful of the dead, and kinda badass. You know, in a never, never do that again kind of way. But leaping out of a skyscraper? That is so next level..."

"It's not like I make a habit of it. And she did catch me. So there's that."

Callie laughed. She saw the envelope. "Ooooh, a wedding? Sounds like fun. Who are the victims?"

"Clark Kent and Lois Lane. It was supposed to have been a year ago, and then the Daxamites invaded and we all got a little... sidetracked. Looks like it's on again."

"When?"

Alex sighed, pulled out her Swiss Army knife and slit the envelope open. "Mid-June."

Callie looked at the dates. "Just a few days before Metropolis Pride."

"Knowing Clark, he probably planned that. He and Lois will probably be the only straight people at his wedding. Well, and my mom. And J'onn." She thought about it for a while. "And Lois's dad."

"So who's your plus-one?"

"Well, it was going to be Agent Vasquez. We were both going to wear tuxedos. I'm pretty sure that my mom would have freaked, but Kara is his Best Person, and she was planning on wearing white tie and tails just like him. And anything Kara does is okay. The mere fact that I'll be going alone will be enough for my mom to completely lose her shit over how I'm living my life."

"Well, if you don't mind a lifelong femme, I can totally manage moms. They just love that their daughter is seeing a surgeon."

"Yeah, my mom's got a PhD. That shit won't impress her. Nothing impresses her."

"Alex, you know me. And you met my parents. I got this. I mean, if you want."

Alex took a swallow of her scotch, pulled a pen out of her pocket and checked off "Salmon. Plus one."

Callie grinned.

Alex said, "But here's the thing. I will be bringing my tacticals and my guns, and it might not be a bad idea for you to bring a surgical bag. Things... tend to go wrong when there are multiple superheroes in the room, and when you add the DEO..."

"Wait. Multiple superheroes? Wait! Metropolis? Shit, you're telling me that Clark Kent--"

"Hush! Yes, he's Kara's cousin. Damn. We're going to have to go see Pam in HR tomorrow. You're going to need to sign more NDAs."

//

Alex got called away for work, but Callie stayed at the bar. All of her belongings were in boxes in her new apartment and she really didn't feel like going home and unpacking. The blue alien in the bad suit, Brian, asked her to play a game of pool with him, and Callie was all about learning more about other cultures, so she said yes and won twenty dollars off him without even trying. When she went back to Alex's booth, another woman had taken her place.

"Oh, sorry. I didn't--"

"Dr. Torres."

"Agent... Vasquez, I think?"

The woman nodded. "Have a seat."

Callie sat, nervous. "I heard Director Jones sent you on a mission?"

Vasquez sighed. "Alas, yes. A mission I came this close to failing at spectacularly. Because I trusted someone I really, really shouldn't have. Stupid. Rookie mistake."

"I'm sorry to hear that."

"Yeah, I very nearly got the entire team killed. You know, the people I was sent to save? Them."

Callie nodded seriously. "I've never met a single surgeon who hasn't lost patients."

"Thanks..."

"Um, but you are going to hate me, I think."

"Why? Because you're sleeping with my ex?"

"No, there has been no sleeping. But I might be going to Clark Kent's wedding with her, to fend off her mom's disapproval..."

Vasquez frowned, pulling a stiff envelope out of her jacket pocket. "Then I guess I am going to need a date..." She glanced up at the doctor's worried look. "I don't hate you, Dr. Torres. But I am not... fond of weddings. Thank you, though, for having her back."

//

When Daisy Johnson pulled out her phone and read the text, her first thought was, yeah, no. She was cool with lesbians, she was totally an ally, but going to a wedding with a woman mainly because the woman's ex was going to be there with an old friend... Superheroing was one thing. This was... different.

She walked into the workout room in the underground SHIELD base, still looking at the text on her phone. She walked straight into Melinda May. A very tanned and surprisingly relaxed Melinda May.

"Daisy? It's not like you to go all millennial on me like that. What's up?"

"Sorry, Agent Piper just asked me to be her plus-one to a wedding her ex is going to with another woman..."

"Oh, Clark and Lois? Phil and I are going too. That'll be great!"

"Wait, you like weddings?"

"No. Nope. Unh uh. Yeah, okay, little bit. Phil can totally dance."

"Yeah, I didn't need to know that. Here's the thing, I'm not gay."

"Piper knows that. She wouldn't ask somebody who might expect a relationship. So she asked somebody who understands a mission. You. Besides. It'll probably turn into some kind of supervillain punch-fest anyway. You'll want to bring those sleeves."

Daisy watched her walk away and turned back to her phone. "Sure, what the hell. Should I bring weapons?"

And Piper texted back, "Duh. Of course. Also, thanks."


	3. Packing Up and Heading Out

Lillian sat in prison. She was not a woman to languish. She was an overeducated white woman who had been engaged with institutions her entire life, even before she started working for LuthorCorp, attracting first the professional attention, and then the personal attention, of its CEO, Lionel Luthor. She understood how systems worked. So when the guard brought her unexpected mail that included a burner phone with the sigil 21 TH, presumably for the 21 Theses of Wittenberg, that Martin Luthor had nailed to the church door, she smiled, murmuring, "Oh, my dear boy."

//

Harold looked at his computer again, ignoring the dog, who was whimpering beside him, because the number that had turned up in his feed had led him to a photograph of a reporter. This was not unusual. In his line of work, reporters often turned up as persons of interest. But when he looked at how often this particular reporter had turned up in the Daily Planet, not as the reporter, but as the, how should he put it? The reportee? Oh, this wasn't good.

//

Maggie watched Lucy pace and fret. It was a little unnerving how uncomfortable Lucy was about having to deal with her sister in Bridezilla mode and her dad in Giving-Away-His-Daughter-to-an Alien mode. So of course, Lucy packed her uniforms, because duh, but she also packed a slinky dress and asked Maggie if she had a slinky dress, and yes, Maggie was a cop and totally rocked the leather jackets, but she also remembered how Alex, poor temporarily-straight Alex, had totally drooled when she wore that slinky dress to the fight club, and Maggie threw a few possibilities into her suitcase and didn't think much more about it. After all, there were going to be a few opportunities to wow Lucy: the wedding rehearsal and the dinner following it, the wedding, the brunch the day after... Maggie knew how weddings went (always the guest and never the bride). She was prepared to make Lucy totally lose her shit every. single. day. (night.) of the weekend.

//

It had taken Winn three days, and some help from Pam in HR, but he had finally convinced J'onn to let him requisition two troop transport trucks to get all the agents from National City to Metropolis. In the end it was Vasquez's months' old predictions of a Cadmus incursion to the wedding that had done the trick, and along with everybody's suitcases and garment bags, there was a rack of rifles and some interesting grenades in each truck. Also, because this was Winn doing the planning, he had written out a list of who would drive when and which rest stops they would stop at. And he had brought Cards Against Humanity, because they might be badass DEO agents who expected to have to kick ass and take names, but they weren't barbarians, after all.

//

Lena brought two garment bags and a small suitcase, but nobody complained because she wore tight faded jeans and a Wonder Woman baseball shirt and her glasses. Pretty much everybody just spent at least a portion of the entire trip absently staring at that amazing jawline. Kara insisted that they shouldn't let Lena drive, because she tended to get distracted and invent things and drive into other things. So she had plenty of time to beat them all at Cards Against Humanity. After all, as she pointed out, she was still a Luthor.

//

Lillian Luthor was many things: a doctor, an engineer, a millionaire, a mother, a patriot. One thing she very definitely was not was an idiot. And when she kept waking up in her prison cell and reliving the same day over and over again, she figured that her darling son who had promised her some very meaningful fun the other day was probably at work to free her. The repeated day trope was his way of making her earn her freedom. Fine.

Day 1: Stabbing her guard with a shiv didn't work.  
Day 2: Seducing the pretty drug mule didn't work.  
Day 3: Helping the red-head "trusty" who ran the kitchen didn't work.  
Day 4-25: Lather, rinse, repeat. She was too fucking old for this.  
Day 26: Finally, after she was punished for whatever she had tried most recently with laundry duty, she thought, Why not go with a classic?

Ah, freedom.

And the fact that it was lemon fresh? Priceless.

//

Lois was exhausted and worried. Reporting on the Worldkillers' attacks on National City wasn't the problem. She thanked God that they hadn't attacked Metropolis. But maybe that fact itself was part of the problem. Three proto-Kryptonians had landed on Earth and had decided to attack what they had presumably seen as the biggest threat to their plan for world domination.

Not Superman.

Supergirl.

And Lois knew that Clark was a feminist intersectional ally even though he was also a privileged white male, and the world routinely turned to him when the chips were down. And he said it didn't bother him. He said he was happy to work this one as a reporter. He said he was fine with Kara not calling on him for help.

But that didn't mean that he didn't have an ego.


	4. Many Lines Converging on a Point in Space

J'onn J'onzz was thrilled when the DEO SUV finally arrived in Metropolis (to a multitude of cheers and a chorus of "New York, New York," [mainly, he privately thought, because no one could make a song called "Metropolis, Metropolis" actually work with human music]).

He preferred flying. Alone.

When they finally pulled up in front of the Metropolis Royal Etude, he climbed out and gave his 300-year-old bones a stretch. Then he said in a low voice, as the team jumped out and started unloading, "Check in, drop your gear in your rooms, and rendezvous in my room in fifteen minutes. Room 808."

//

Amos Tempus did not consider himself a genius, whatever other people said of him. He had never been a brilliant student, certainly. It was just that he had a gift when it came to time. He had not at first realized in high school that other students who received low grades on tests didn't study for a week and then come back to the original test day and take the test again. He had figured it out eventually of course, in college, when his friends had insisted on watching Groundhog Day, and he finally realized he was... different.

He had only ever divulged his secret to one person, his friend, Alex, who had sworn to keep his secret safe. So when Alex's mom had contacted him, and said she had a problem, one with unforeseeable negative consequences for the world, and might he help?

Of course he said yes.

//

With all of the follow-up articles Perry White had been demanding in the aftermath of the "Worldkiller Debacle"--and who still used the word debacle? Or great Caesar's ghost, for that matter?--all that work had left Clark Kent pretty gosh-darn busy. But when Lois had asked him so nicely to finalize things with the pianist for the wedding, how could he say no?

And the man was friendly enough, adjusting his horn-rimmed glasses awkwardly as they talked about payment. He had described the other members of his swing band and the kind of music they played--from classic swing to ragtime, to Sinatra to, wait, what? Twisted Sister? Anyway, the man implied that this one might be off the books, so could he pay cash? And if he needed to cancel for any reason, there was a table with the amount they would forfeit of the downpayment, depending on how early he let them know.

Which was very reasonable, thought Clark, considering his... situation.

//

"Seriously?" Melinda asked, as she got into the passenger seat next to Phil. "This is the best ride Mack could get us?"

Phil gestured to the pink shag rug that lined the VW bus. "What's not to love? It's vintage!"

She rolled her eyes.

Daisy hid her smile, texting Mack:

FlowerQuake: You owe me 20 bucks. May's freaking over the shag.

Piper leaned over to read the texts and chuckled. "If she finds out..."

Daisy whispered, "She knows him. If she doesn't know, she for fuck's sake absolutely guesses."

Piper nodded.

Daisy squeezed her hand. "Don't worry. We got this."

"This ride? Or this wedding?"

"Duh, this wedding. Nothing's going to happen. This is going to be the best protected wedding in the history of weddings!"

Piper frowned. Daisy hadn't given it too much thought, but it did seem like Piper frowned rather a lot. "Why? What do you think is going to happen?"

"Daisy, have you ever played chess?"

"What? No, I'm more of a Texas Hold 'em kind of gal. Why?"

"Because chess teaches you to think several steps ahead."

"So?"

"So there's Hydra and Cadmus and the Joker and Lex and--"

"Dude, relax! Nobody's going to crash this party!"

"Daisy," Piper said very seriously. "I adore you, I do, but have you never heard of jinxing something?"

Daisy opened her mouth, then shut it again. In a small voice, she said, "Sorry..."

//

When Lois came home, Clark had literally paced a worn track in the carpet. She pinched her nose, thinking, I had to date a Kryptonian.

"Lois," he said nervously, adjusting his glasses.

Lois pulled out a bottle opener and a bottle of Cabernet. "Hello to you too, Clark."

"Um, so I spoke with the musician, as you asked, and, um, signed the contract with his band. It, uh, had a strange clause."

"You're telling me you actually read the fine print?"

"Well, of course." Glasses. "It's the responsible thing to do."

She poured a full glass, up to the rim, then took several sips in a row. "Yes, responsible. And what did this clause say?"

"Well, it was the table of how much of our downpayment we get back depending on how close to the wedding day we cancel."

Lois choked on her wine and coughed. "Cancel?"

"Well, not that we would! Of course not. We've been together so many years! But J'onn J'onzz and Phil Coulson both just texted me to make sure that we didn't have anything, you know, on our radar."

"Our radar."

"Supervillains," he said helpfully. "Lex, et al."

And Lois loved Clark to bits, she really did, but what kind of guy would phrase his own cold feet about a wedding verbally using "et al."?


	5. In the Eleventh Hour

Snipers were always told that there would always be something snapping loose to use as a windsock, but that had not been this particular sniper's experience. So: due diligence, yada, yada. Conveniently, on the roof of the Metropolitan Royal Etude, there was a flagpole, although the wind that caught the flag twenty feet above the roof was not the same as the wind that caught, for example, a new small streamer much closer to the roof. Preparation was important, after all.

//

After the team x-ray checked the hotel top to bottom and Winn set up his computers in J'onn's room, everybody got ready for the rehearsal if they were in the wedding, or for relaxing over their own dinner if they were not.

Kara wore her usual Kara clothes to the rehearsal: polka-dotted shirt, navy chinos, loafers. Glasses much like her cousin's. At the church, she stood behind Clark while Alex and James processed up the aisle together, followed by Lucy, followed by Lois and General Lane. The white-haired woman in the clerical collar explained how the vows would go, when people would sit, stand, kneel, sit again, and process out.

Then it was time for dinner, back at the hotel. The maitre d' led them to the far right corner of the restaurant, but as they walked through, they passed two other tables--one with all of their friends and "plus-ones": Lena, Callie, Maggie and J'onn and M'gann--and the other with unexpected friends--Phil Coulson, Melinda May, Daisy Johnson, and Agent Vasquez. Alex walked into a wall.

To Lois's consternation, the DEO group picked up their drinks and asked the waiters to extend the rehearsal table. Then the SHIELD folks joined them. It was a nightmare. Lois did her best to keep her father on one side of her and Clark, and J'onn, Alex and Lucy on the other. But there wasn't much she could do about the rest of them. Kara at least had the decency to keep Lena Luthor at the farthest end of the increasingly long table, but she noted that Alex seemed surrounded by Maggie, the surgeon, and Daisy and her date Vasquez. The whole thing seemed--she grimaced--super awkward. And unlike her fiancé, these chicks enjoyed their booze.

Halfway through dinner, Eliza Danvers arrived, her flight from Midvale having been postponed twice due to thunderstorms. She sat on the far end, next to Clark and across from General Lane, and Clark had done his level best to keep the small talk between the liberal scientist and her conservative Army father, well, nonviolent, if not particularly cordial.

On her other side, Lois watched Maggie and Lucy make awkward small talk with Alex and Callie, and then Alex and Callie take a respite from that by making awkward small talk with Agent Vasquez and Daisy Johnson. There was a tremendous amount of tension in the middle of the table, which eased at the other end. May, Coulson, M'gann and J'onn seemed to be having a lovely time trading war stories, and of course, Kara, Lena, Winn and Jimmy had been good friends for years.

Lois let out a breath and turned her focus back on her salmon and asparagus. Yes, the wine was flowing fast and freely, but at least no fights were likely to break out during this wedding. One of the waiters, a tall silver fox, came over and said that that the manager had offered four bottles of a mid-level Côte du Rhone on the house. That put even these hardened spies, superheroes and writers over the top, and they paid their checks and dragged themselves back to their hotel rooms, yawning.


	6. Puttin' On the Ritz

J'onn J'onzz woke a minute before his alarm went off and he rose, stretched and checked the DEO computers set up on the room's dresser for any pings that might have gone off while he slept so soundly. None of Winn's usual scans had gone off: not the scan for lead or kryptonite or solid Kryptonian (unaccounted for) bodies. The only odd thing was that the three computers were out of sync, about two minutes different from each other. He'd have Winn look at it, if Winn wasn't the hungover disaster that J'onn suspected he might be. M'gann got up and went to the bathroom just as a knock sounded on his door.

Alex stood there looking bleary, wearing black pants and patent leather oxfords, a white shirt with black studs and silver cufflinks with the crest of the House of El. In one hand she held a black bowtie. 

"Um, J'onn, could you help me with this thing? It's a freaking nightmare."

J'onn smiled. "Come on in."

//

In their room down the hall, Maggie and Lucy were throwing back hair-of-the-dog bloody Mary's and dealing with their own sartorial issues. Maggie had worn bowties before in drag king shows to benefit LGBTQ+ shelters in National City and Gotham, so she was fine. Lucy snagged two pairs of nylons before she managed to get a pair on successfully. Maggie didn't miss that side of dressing in a feminine way, though she appreciated that Lucy (mostly) didn't mind the bother. Maggie made sure to wiggle her eyebrows just a little. Lucy needed to remember that she had at least as much game as her sister (more really), today of all days.

//

Daisy stood in the bathroom in the floral dress, putting on her makeup. Vasquez came into the doorway, looking dapper in her tux and said, "How do I look?"

Daisy said, "Almost perfect, but your hair is sticking up a little in back. I can fix that with some hairspray, if you like."

Vasquez made a face. "Then I'll smell like a girl."

"You are a girl."

"Yeah, but not a Lois-style girl."

"Yeah, but dude, none of us are Lois-style girls." She thought about it, then added, "Maybe Lena."

"Oh, honey, no. Lena blows past Lois in the femme department and leaves her twisting in the wind." She sighed. "Fine. Do it."

A small application of hairspray did the trick.

At the door, Vasquez offered Daisy her arm, but Daisy said, "Yeah, I'm not that type of plus-one. Sorry."

Vasquez shrugged philosophically. "Can't blame a girl for trying."

//

Kara stood in front of the mirror fussing with her white bowtie. Normally, she could do this; she'd used superspeed to practice with a YouTube video for the past month. But now she was nervous. This was Kal-El, after all. She had to get it exactly right. Lena smiled gently, not needing to be told, put her hands on Kara's shoulders and turned her away from the mirror, saying, "Let me."

Kara gaped a bit. "But you're so amazingly feminine! How would you know how to do this?"

Lena tied the tie with confidence. "When Lionel got sick, his hands trembled--a side effect of the drugs he was on. So I helped him. And you know me, Kara. I never do anything halfway."

The smirk made Kara blush. As a Kryptonian and a scotch drinker, the two of them had made it back to their room the night before entirely unimpaired by the wine. And Lena had conveniently packed a miniaturized red sunlight emitter...

"You're going to do him proud, Kara."

"Thanks for coming with me," said Kara quietly. "I know Lois and the general..."

"Have been avoiding me. Yeah, I don't take that personally. And you and me, Kara Zor-El? El Mayarah."

//

Lois stood pacing in her room on the fifth floor, three stories above Clark and most of the others. The dress was white (something new) and came to calf level--all the better for running in. It wasn't the look she'd dreamt of as a little girl, but having been kidnapped by Lex Luthor thirty-nine times in the last fourteen years, she figured it made sense to combine style with pragmatism. Her white heels were low and comfortable (something old). Her necklace, a tiny sapphire pentagon, was a wedding present from Eliza Danvers, who had been nothing but kind to her over the years (something blue).

There was a knock on her door. She opened it to see her sister looking surprisingly non-soldier-like in the floral bridesmaid's dress. "Did you get my text?" Lois asked.

"Of course. J'onn is sitting down with Clark as we speak, talking him off the ledge. Oh, and I have something for you. But I'll want it back."

She tucked a lacy white handkerchief into the small space of Lois's decolletage. "On the off chance that the Woman of Steel is capable of crying. Now, come on. Let's get you to the church on time." (something borrowed)


	7. The Church. On Time.

Alex and James, resplendent in their tuxes, ushered the women to their seats and guided the men. On Lois's side in front were a number of soldiers, male and female, in uniform. On Clark's side, there were quite a lot of tuxes, some of them even worn by men (Perry White, Winn, Bruce Wayne, J'onn and Phil). Daisy's eyes got big as Diana Prince said with that gorgeous accent of hers, "Daisy Johnson? I've heard so much about you from Mr. Coulson and Agent May. What a lovely dress."

When the congregation was seated, Alex and James went to the sacristy, the small room next to the sanctuary. Clark and Kara both wore white tie and tails. Like Alex and James, they also had House of El cufflinks. Clark was seated and Kara was speaking quietly in Kryptonian, soothing his nerves, although privately Alex thought he didn't understand the meaning, just the tone.

Clark opened his eyes, gulping. "Is it time?" He looked at his watch. "It's five minutes early."

James looked at his own. "It's five minutes past."

Alex said, "We're right on time."

Kara smiled. "When it come to love, the time is always right."

And although Alex had some doubts about the truth of that, it seemed to make Clark calmer. He and Kara went to stand in the front of the church, while Alex and James calmly moved down the side aisle and joined the rest of the wedding party in the lobby. Lucy and her father were quietly talking to Lois, who looked as nervous as Clark.

Inside the church, the Wedding March started. (And Alex thought, Trust Lois to be traditional.) Alex and James opened the lobby doors and walked slowly up the aisle together. (And Alex thought, This is not how I anticipated walking down the aisle of a church with a guy!)

As they reached the front, James sat in the second pew with Maggie and Lena. Alex went to stand with Callie Torres and Winn a few feet behind Kara, where a microphone was set up. Kara squeezed Clark's shoulder as she saw Lucy stand in the doorway. Clark was looking beyond her, eyes shining. Kara stepped up to the microphone as the music changed. She sang:

Can you read my mind?  
Can you tell what it is I'm thinking of?  
Don't know who you are.  
Just a friend from another star.

Lucy began to walk up the aisle. Lois and General Lane waited in the doorway. Alex, Callie and Winn joined Kara, singing:

Here I am, like a kid out of school,  
Holding hands with a god. I'm a fool.  
Will you look at me, quivering,  
Like a little kid, shivering.  
You can see right through me.

Lucy reached the front and stood across from Clark. Sam and Lois began their procession. Kara sang alone:

Can you read my mind?  
Can you picture the things I'm thinking of?  
Wondering why you are  
All the wonderful things you are.  
You can fly, you belong to the sky.  
You and I  
Could belong to each other.

As Lois approached Clark and Sam Lane gave him her hand, all four of the singers threw themselves into the end of the song:

If you need a friend,  
I'm the one to fly to!  
If you need  
To be loved:  
Here I am

Read

My

Mind...

Lois Lane and Clark Kent faced each other, holding hands and beaming.

And then the world exploded.

//

It wasn't a normal explosion, Kara thought. There wasn't smoke or fire, just percussive force tearing from the back to the front of the church and time seeming to slow down. She turned behind and said to Winn, "Get... Callie... out..." And eventually, he nodded and the two of them inched their way toward the sacristy, where there was an exit.

Then she turned to Clark, who had embraced Lois, and Lucy and Sam Lane were diving on top of them, but far too slowly.

In contrast, Batman and Wonder Woman were racing toward the men in black tactical gear who were themselves pushing through glue to move forward with their alien rifles, so the Man of Steel's two friends disarmed them faster than the Flash would have and had them zip-tied near the baptismal font.

Kara took a step forward and zoomed toward James, pushing him to get Eliza and Perry out the same way that Winn had gone with Callie. In the second pew, Maggie had pulled her Glock and was rushing Lena out after them. Kara saw Alex pull out two pistols from the back of her waistband: she handed the alien pistol to Vasquez and kept the one Winn had built for her. They raced toward Lillian Luthor side by side, stuttering through moments of slow motion and superspeed as more attackers in black poured through the door, but Batman and Wonder Woman reached the enemy first.

Kara pushed through the waves of slowness until she reached Phil and Melinda, who also seemed temporally stuck until Daisy raised her hands and quaked the whole church. Fighters on both sides fell to the floor amid a shower of shattered stained glass, but they fell in real time.

The Metropolis Chief of Police was on his phone in a heartbeat, and Kara went back to Clark and they both stood there adjusting their glasses while Batman, Wonder Woman and DEO agents aided the MPD in detaining the terrorists.

No one was surprised to see a yellow and red hourglass symbol, an old Cadmus logo, on the attackers' arm-patches.

After the police had finished taking statements and left, the priest ran her hand through her short white hair and said, "Let's get back to work, shall we? Will everyone take their places?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Can You Read My Mind?" by John T. Williams and Leslie Bricusse.


	8. Just When You Think It's Safe to Drink a Toast

The reception hall of the Metropolis Royal Etude was on the top floor, with spectacular views of Metropolis gilded in the late afternoon sunlight. Lois and Clark (Mr. and Mrs. Kent) processed into the hall to applause from their friends, family, and protectors (if that wasn't redundant). As they went through the reception line, people kept telling Lois that she was sparkling, though she wondered if that mightn't have been because she still had bits of stained glass in her hair.

At the short-term open bar, their guests were taking advantage of the free-flowing booze to steady their nerves. At that point, Lois couldn't really blame them. Eventually, they all took their places at the tables. Lena was talking quietly to the priest before she took her place next to Kara, and when she gave the benediction, the priest looked far less unhappy than she had in the church. Then the waiters went around with champagne for all the guests and Kara stood, adjusting her glasses and raising her glass.

As people quieted, she said, "My cousin,Clark has always been a great role model for me, showing me how to be the best... reporter I can be and hoping I can serve my city the way he serves his. I'm so happy that he found you, Lois--"

And here she raised her glass higher to Lois, but Lois, the astute reporter, thought it was to hide how she was distracted by something outside the window, maybe a flashing light.

"It's so beautiful the way your love enables you to always have each others' backs! To Clark and Lois!"

Everyone drank. Kara whispered something to Lena and hurried from the room, frowning and reaching up to take off her glasses.

Lucy stood next and everyone's attention turned to her. Lois had been afraid that her toast would be snarky, but instead it was in turns funny, sweet, warm and hopeful, and it ended, "To Lois and Clark!"

Everyone drank. Lois glanced out the window and saw what looked to her practiced eye like a flying someone with superspeed carrying a prisoner and their weapon. So maybe, just maybe, she could get through the rest of her wedding with no more broken glass.

//

Sitting at another table facing the main table, Alex saw what Lois saw, and she murmured in her earbud to the other DEO agents; from his table, J'onn nodded his readiness, but by the time Kara returned from powdering her nose (or someone else's nose), the problem seemed to have been averted.

But she noticed that Kara's eyes repeatedly swept the room during dinner, and occasionally, she dropped her glasses a fraction of an inch--almost as if she were x-raying the room. Crinkle.

//

The caterers were less busy in the kitchen once the entrees went out, but the main chef still had to oversee the dessert plates, yell at the staff who were working too slow, and take a moment to ask a waiter if the special dietary needs of that one guest had been met.

"Doesn't look like it," murmured the tall man. "Maybe we can arrange a special dessert for him to make up for it."

"Do you have an extra supply of that sugar-free icing?"

Subtly, the waiter passed her a small vial. "Just remember. We don't have a plan C."

"John, you know me better than that."

And later, as he was collecting the empty entree plates from the head table, the waiter noticed that the Best Person's forehead was crinkled, but he didn't think much of it. Many people hated weddings.

The small swing band was quite good at getting the guests dancing and the waiter did his part to help with that by bringing the musicians each a glass of beer during their short break.

The pianist adjusted his glasses, murmuring, "Thanks for his. I thought it was never coming."

"If we're lucky," said the waiter, "there just might be something else during the dessert course."

The waiter stood by the wall, almost like a soldier at parade rest, watching the room, presumably for dirty plates he could take away. He watched the women in tuxedos and floral dresses take turns dancing together, and it looked strangely more deliberate than women friends dancing together usually did, almost as if they were passing information or coming to a consensus. He tapped his earbud and murmured, "If a woman in a tuxedo or a floral dress approaches you, abort immediately. Over."

"If you say so, you big lug."

What the waiter missed because of this distraction was the male usher passing an earbud to Bruce Wayne, the billionaire inventor, who passed it on during a slow dance to the tall woman with the red dress and interesting accent.

And when the caterer came out to ask the man with the special dietary needs if he would like a special dessert, the woman in the red dress had separated from Wayne, apparently heading to the ladies' room. But then she had grabbed the caterer's arm in an iron grip and taken her into the ladies' room with her.

The waiter frowned. Then he saw Wayne and the Best Person walk toward him, grab his arm in an iron grip and drag him into the ladies' room after them. And then John Reese, who thought he'd seen everything, was introduced to the Lasso of Truth.


	9. Epilogue

Everyone said afterwards what an enjoyable reception it had been, except for the swing band's pianist getting a sudden nosebleed and having to leave early, and the odd vibration coming from the sound system in the last half hour, that gave some people headaches.

But, terrorist attack notwithstanding, everyone agreed that as long as Lois and Clark were safely married, they could go back to living their regular lives, happy to have been there when it happened.

The wedding party and their friends all went back to their rooms: M'gann with J'onn, Coulson with May, Lena with Kara, Maggie with Callie, Vasquez with Diana, and Alex with Daisy.

And the next day they went home as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened. Because, of course, for this group of world-saving individuals, nothing really had.


End file.
